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America in Crisis – He said “Winers”, not “Whiners.” Part One – Underlying Causes of the Current Economic Crises

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by Beertheostorian A 1
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We have received a number of comments from Unpublished Anonymous Individuals attacking the introductory article. In particular, my assertion that the United States of America is currently the world’s sole superpower because it has become the greatest beer producing nation in the history of mankind.

Just visited your site. I got stopped after reading the first sentence: ‘As we all know, the United States of America is currently the world’s sole superpower.’ I suggest you may want to change that (or remove it) in light of what’s happening these days! That statement doesn’t seem real considering the economy of the country versus the economy of some others. (Unpublished Anonymous Individuals [UAI])

This statement clearly ignores proper beer analysis. It fails to address the most fundamental principal of the Beer Theory of History, the Nation with the Most and Best Beer Wins. It is this sort of ignorant anti-American drivel that makes understanding the Beer Theory of History more urgent than ever. Yes the U.S. economy is reeling, but the repercussions are being felt world wide. Here we have an economic crisis that stems from four main sources some of which are  eroding the very foundations of our civilization.
           
One, since 2003 China produces larger quantities of beer than the United States. Fortunately, great offerings from the likes of  the Ommegang brewery of Cooperstown, NY, Shipyard Brewery of Portland, Maine,  the Harpoon Brewery of Boston, the Dogfishhead brewery of Delaware, Abita in Louisiana, let alone the great breweries of the west like Mendicino, Anchor, or Stone Brewing companies, just to name a few have kept us afloat. Nonetheless, this trend is growing and the resurgent Russians represent the third largest brewing nation, sort of squeezing us in the middle.
           
Two,  in 2006 the main storage facility for hops in the United States burned down. This combined with the conversion of much of the hops growing fields to corn production for ethanol and other corn products combined to increase U.S. hops prices nearly eightfold and increasing beer costs nearly 15 to 20%.1 This is an issue that can and should be addressed by federal and state legislatures and can be corrected relatively easily within a few years.
           
Three, the United States has devolved from a from an unquestionably beer drinking society in the 1990’s to an increasingly wine drinking society this decade. The problem is so severe that this past July former Texas Senator Phil Gramm commented on the phenomenon as it continued to damage the beer economy, including the once potent Texas brewing industry: “We have sort of become a nation of winers. You just hear about this constant wining, complaining about a loss of competitiveness, America in decline . . . You’ve heard of mental depression; this is a mental recession." This mild statement should not have raised anyone’s ire. The use of the word “sort of” cast doubt on the obvious; wine drinking is a root cause in the deterioration of America and our civilization.
                       
Yet, the mainstream media, intent on avoiding its own culpability in creating this fin de sicle by corrupting public virtues through the promotion of this wine drinking ideology, grossly misquoted the former Texas senator.  "We have sort of become a nation of whiners. You just hear this constant whining, complaining about a loss of competitiveness, America in decline  . . .

You’ve heard of mental depression; this is a mental recession." Then they used their wine swilling lap dogs in both political parties to attack Mr. Gramm as somehow insensitive to Americans economic conditions. It became so bad that the misquote lead the McCain campaign to effectively can Gramm. The choice of Sarah Palin as his running mate further demonstrates the unhealthy influence wine is having on critical members of McCain’s staff. 2
           
Four, the sale of Anheuser Busch to InBev  destabilized the economy further. Admittedly the rapidity of the crash after this event surprised even this author.3 After all it took ten years after prohibition before the Great Crash of 1929. Now many people point to the collapse of the sub-prime mortgage market as triggering this crisis, yet as you can see there are four much deeper causes leading to the current economic morass: One, Chinese production of mass quantities;4 Two, the Hops shortage; Three, increased wine drinking; Four, the sale of our largest single brewer to a foreign interest.
           
These issues have raised serious doubts as to whether the United States really is the nation with the most and best beer and this has created the underlying crisis in confidence among investors that is reeking havoc on Wall Street today. This crisis in confidence, in addition to their fundamental misunderstanding of the principles of the Beer Theory of History, coaxed the Wall Street movers and shakers to create artificial value in the hopes that it could float the economy until the beer situation stabilized. In short, it was not greed that lead to this economic crisis, but structural failures in the US beer economy and the ignorance of our best and brightest economic minds to understand the fundamentals of the Beer Theory of History.5  We at Tavernator.com intend to create the knowledge base necessary to avoid such crises in the future.                                                                                                                        

1Scherer, Ed: Impromptu Symposium on Beer and Economics, Mahwah, January 2008.

2 (The Editors) The MILF factor has managed make the choice of Palin appear far more palatable to the predominately white male punditry. Generally she scores well with white males across the board.

3Further demonstrating the need for large quantities of government money to be thrown into the research necessary to fully understand the phenomenon that is the Beer Theory of History. See The Beer Theory of History – Introduction.

4A number of genetically mutated French aliens are reputed to have left the United States as a result of this change.

5 Any attorney attempting to defend these Wall Street moguls should not hesitate to point out that these men are not ruthless greedy manipulators caught in their own matrix of value fabrication. Instead they are innocent victims of their ill-informed and misguided attempts to correct the forces eroding the foundations of our civilization: Great beer and brewing mass quantities of great beer.

© 2008 Beertheostory, Inc.